Listening

“The first duty of love is to listen.” – Paul Tillich

In the contentious nature of today’s society, it seems that few of us desire to live out this first duty—to truly listen. We are often eager to have our points heard, but reluctant to take even a moment to consider a different perspective. Instead, we rush to articulate our limited understanding, drop the proverbial mic, and move on.

Alan Alda once said, “Listening is being open to change through the other person.” That is a remarkable idea. As I grow older (and, I hope, wiser), this truth resonates more deeply with me. Yet, I must admit that I often approach conversations with a set of beliefs I am confident are correct. They may indeed be right for me and my current context, but for my neighbor, they might not fit. Even now, in writing this, I find myself tempted to speak in absolutes rather than embracing the need to be more fluid, like water.

The truth is, I believe each of us can learn from others—their successes, their failures—but only if we are more willing to listen than to speak, to learn rather than to teach, and even to admit when we are wrong. This doesn’t mean blind agreement; listening is about understanding, broadening our perspectives, and cultivating a willingness to grow.

James, the servant of the Lord and earthly brother of Jesus, offers this wisdom:
“Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (James 1:19, NLT).

As followers of Jesus, we would be wise to heed this advice. While I know I will continue to struggle, imagine how different our communities could be if we were even half as eager to listen as we are to share our opinions or make demands. Imagine if our first step in loving our neighbor was to listen.

Holy God, open my ears and hold my tongue. Help me to hear my siblings in Christ and love them as You love us. Amen.

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